What a find!

On our morning walk, Jacob and I stumbled upon a yard sale filled with Jacob-appropriate stuff. We simply couldn't pass up the backyard swing and slide set with cube for $15!! What a deal!!
Jacob enjoyed the set for all of 4 minutes. After he had patted every inch of the plastic house, steering wheel, swing, and bridge, after I so gingerly helped him down the slide,



he decided he preferred the grass.

Guess my $15 would have been better spent on a bag of Kentucky Bluegrass.

Baked Beans

Question: Does Jacob like baked beans?

Answer: Yes, he does.

Question: Does Jacob like baked beans in his hair?

Answer: Yes, he does.

We've been at the Beach

Yeah, it's been a rough past week for the Simpson's. We had to go with the elder Simpson's to Myrtle Beach on vacation. It was rough. All that playing in the pool, surfing the waves at the beach and hamming it up with Macie really takes a toll on ya.

Let's start at the beginning, shall we? Our flights were great. There's something to be said for having a second person present when flying with a baby. You can hold said baby when he's being cute and charming and you can hand said baby over when he becomes fussy and cranky.

We arrived in N.C on Friday and were greeted by Grammy. Grammy had some trepidations about Jacob warming up to her. So, she pulled out, not one, but 2 secret weapons: the porch swing and a ball. That Grammy's a wily one, for sure!

After a solid nights sleep, we all loaded up in the van and made the 5hr. trek to the beach. It was supposed to only take 4hrs. but with all the stopping for food, candy, potty breaks, etc., not to mention the horrendous Myrtle Beach traffic, it took for freakin' ever to get there. Wanna know the difference between a 5yr.-old and an 11-month-old on a long trip? Here's your answer:

Except for Macie asking us every 3 1/2 to 7 3/4 minutes "Are we there, yet?", he did really well. Poor Jacob, though. He had poopy right in the middle of stopped traffic. So, we did a quick, but according to him, not painless, change in the floor of the van. Sara used her German Shepard-like nose to alert us to Jacob's poopy and to me secretly sneaking Chewy Sprees in the back of the van (didn't feel like sharing with anyone at the time). But, thanks to Sara's nose, I was forced to hand over my dulce to a greedy little 5yr.-old candy monger named Macie. Right, like he needed more candy than he already had. As for me, I just wanted to enjoy my sweets in private. Thanks, Sara.

Once we arrived, finally, at our destination, everyone donned their suits and hit the pool! Brian entertained Macie by playing "Alligator" and Jacob entertained me by sticking his face in the water in an apparent attempt to eat it. In case you were wondering, he never quite figured out how to eat the water. In fact, his attempts were often met with gagging, choking and sputtering. Didn't deter him, though. He kept right on trying. Mr. Persistent!

Can't say that the actual beach was a big hit with the little man. No, I think the sand, surf and people were a bit overwhelming. I honestly can't blame him. I mean, there were waaaaay too many people wearing things that they were either too old or too fat to be wearing. Kinda made me want to cry, too. So, in order to keep everyone calm, we spent the majority of our beach trip at the pool. Go Figure.We also took a stroll around beautiful Charleston, S.C. Lots to do and see there. Pretty buildings, nice water views, jerky Subway workers. Ok, why does it seem that I'm always having issues at food places? I just wanted extra black olives. Dude only put, like 4 on as "extra." Since when does 4 constitute "extra?" So, I asked for more. Again, I received 4. I asked for more. 4. More, please. 4. Finally I said to the guy, "I'll pay for more. Please give me more." He was so frustrated with me, and I think life. Didn't get the impression that he was pleased with the way his life had unfolded up to this point. Anyway, he turned to the cashier and curtly said to her, "Charge her." Where's Jared when you need him?

While in Charleston we toured the state aquarium. Dolly enjoyed yelling and banging on the glass of the tanks. Great. That's the kind of parent that I've turned out to be. I used to work at the North Carolina State Aquarium and I always loathed parents who let their kids yell at the fish and slap the glass. They would always laugh at this behavior like it was cute or something. Turns out, it is cute. Who knew? So, yeah, that annoying parent is me now. Woo-hoo.

According to Brian and Grampy, Jacob took his first steps. I'm skeptical, though, because they were the only ones who witnessed this big event in a room full of people. But they swear to it, much like those who swear to seeing Big Foot or Fang Boy. You kinda just look at them and verbally pat them on the head by saying, "Sure you did. Yep. I bet it was really amazing to see that." So, now, Brian and Jacob have this "walking date" they call it where Jacob attempts to "walk" to Brian. I don't consider it walking because Jacob takes like, one, step and then kinda falls forward. Brian then catches him and looks up at me, smiling, like, "Did you see THAT!" I always smile and say, "Yeah, I did, honey. Wow! He's really close to bi-pedling on his own, huh? And he owes it all to you and your walking dates! Good work, Dad." Then I turn away and roll my eyes. The kid's going to walk when I say so. That's how it's going to work in this house! I have decided that he's allow to stand independently for, say, 15-20 seconds at a time now and then in a couple of weeks, I'll allow him to take some steps. If he cleans his room, that is.
Jacob and I decided to surprise my parents and Grandmom with a quick trip up to Carolina Beach. Grandpa was in on the surprise. You can imagine Grandma's surprise to see Jacob standing in her living room floor unannounced. You can imagine Jacob's surprise to see Grandma in just a towel. Turns out Grandma had just gotten out of the shower. Mom, you can thank me later for not posting that pic.

We all loaded up in Grandpa's love machine and took Great-Grandmom out for lunch. She was so excited to see Jacob that she allowed him to pound on the table. She never let's me pound on the table. Playing favorites, no fair. It was sad to say goodbye, but Jacob and I thoroughly enjoyed seeing the Carolina Beach folk.

Later in the week, Mike was nice enough to take family pictures of Brian, Jacob and me. He did a great job! Probably because he had such awesome subjects to shoot.

The best thing that came out of this beach trip? Jacob and dog-in-the-tractor-guy became friends. I guess they worked out their differences.We finished off the week with a family picture and headed back to good 'ol Arkansas. Sure enjoyed our trip!! Thanks, Mike and Nancy!!

My kid wants to party all the time...

It's been a busy summer for Jacob, with all of the parties and all. Don't worry, he's always home by curfew: 7p.m. sharp!


The summer kicked off with pool party at the Holiday Inn in downtown Fort Smith.
The highlight of this party goes something like this: Brian takes the large, black diaper bag to the restroom and changes out of his swim trunks while all the girls, and Jacob, awaited the pizza. Brian returns to the room, dressed as shown below, toting the large, black diaper bag. As he walks in, the birthday-girl's grandmother announces, "Hey, girls! The Pizza Guy's here!" She thought Brian was the pizza guy!! I love it!! Razorback Pizza Delivers!!



Our next shindig takes us to a backyard pool party. The water was a wee bit cold for Jacob's taste,

so he spent time hanging out with dad on the sidelines.In this pic, Brian's giving me a look because I tried to gently encourage Jacob to enjoy the brisk water by making him sit down in the kiddie wading pool. It didn't go over well and Brian spent the next several minutes calming down our son. I think I heard him say to Jacob as he was comforting him, "It's ok, son. She does crap like that to me. Like when I'm scared to pick up a cricket in the house and put it outside, she forces me to touch it. It makes me cry, too. So, it's ok. She means well. I think that she's just trying to toughen us up. She doesn't want us to be mamby-pambys. So, if you think about it in those terms, she's actually doing us a favor. You know, we should thank her in some way. Hmmmm....I know!! Let's clean the house for her!! Yeah, she'd love that!!"

Well, I didn't hold my breath. House is still dirty, floor is still dirty, as evidenced by the blackened feet of my 10-month-old after he takes a couple of laps around the house with his trusty chair.

Next, we have the Fun 4th Celebration with the Dean's. It had been several months since we'd hung out with our closest friends and we were amazed at William's ability to balance objects on his head.

Last time we saw him, this was just a burgeoning talent. But man, he's got it down! He taught Jacob his cool trick.

Then, of course, Jacob had to up the ante. He was like, "Hey, William. I can balance 2 of these rings on my head while gnawing on this here ball. When you're 10-months-old, you'll be able to do this, too." Just like a guy.

Dean was voted "Guitar Hero", not so much for his Guitar Hero skills but because of his pretty Hawaiian shirt.

Then we took the requisite 43 since-we're-all-together,-let's-take-some-pictures-of-all-of-us-with-the-cool-timer-option-on-the-camera pictures. You know what I'm talking about. The pictures where it's really funny at first to squeeze everyone together and you get a big kick out of being close to the person next to you to the point that you kinda become giddy. And then....click! Presto! The 1st timer pic. is born!

Then, you take 15 more and it just gets kinda dumb.And finally, your son gets bored and refuses to look at the camera but the Dean's are still into it.

Yeah, you know the process. Happens every time we're with the Dean's.

Anyway, I wanted to show you footage of how well it goes over when the Simpson's announce that they must leave the party. Here, Jacob tells William that we have to hit the road. Watch how he takes the disappointing news.

We're used to this reaction by now. I mean, it happens every time we leave. So, Jacob's decided that when it's time for the Simpson's to leave, he's going to give the people one more show. He calls it the Wiggles Dance:

It works, too, because we keep getting invites. So, the moral of the story is: give the people what they want---Jacob dancing---and your summer will be fraught with parties, too!!